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The Dreaded First Date

By: bricko@tconl.com

That dreaded first date. Everyone who has dated has gone through this ritual, that some compare to a root canal without anesthesia. It doesn’t have to be a stress-filled occasion. By this time you’ve either emailed, or used an instant messenger program, or even had your virtual date. You’ve gotten to kind of know this person, their sense of humor, what foods they like and which movies they’re likely to watch.

A good time and place for a first date is over coffee or lunch at a café or restaurant where you can have some measure of privacy without strangers eavesdropping. You can ‘size’ each other up, to borrow a phrase, to determine if they look and act exactly how they told you or how much they embellished upon themselves.. This way, if it doesn’t work out, you both will have only spent less than an hour or your time. Better to find out over a short-term time investment. Plus, you can meet the person without having to devote several hours over dinner and a movie.

The main reason for meeting during daylight hours in a busy place of business is that there are people around you. In this day and age, you really have to take care of yourself and your safety. I’m not suggesting carrying a Billy Club, but to think what do you really know about this person? When meeting, watch their demeanor and listen to their answers to your questions. Do they look you in the eye or constantly shift their eyes sideways or check out who else is around? Do they evade your questions or topic of conversation?

Another suggestion I have is to do a little research on them. I’m not suggesting you run a complete background check, but place their name in a few search engines. Does something come up at the Sheriff’s department? If not, then you can rest easier and meet him or her, knowing your potential date doesn’t have anything to hide.

If everything is going along fine at this point, the conversation is stimulating, they aren’t axe-murderers and you are getting along great then you can make an agreement for a second date.

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